We have arrived
In Denmark
Dear reader,
It has been two weeks since we (the core team of eleven comprising Phase I of Regenera) landed in Åsum, Denmark.
What started out as a dream of researching community in order to foster a more regenerative way of living, shared by me, Jonas Ratza, Nina Chausow, and Karl Steyaert, has now become a breathing, laughing, crying, feeling, reality.
Since March 8th, Avalonhuset has been home to an extraordinary birthday celebration, withholds sessions, emotional healing processes in multiple modalities, experiments in shifting identity, deep cleans of the house, abundant bread baking and kefir brewing, spontaneous meetings of the Planetary Peace Council, visits from a parakeet named Reggie, a field trip to a local farm to buy raw milk, the establishment of a bulk food ordering system, daily meditation, twice weekly Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, the creation of the Regenera podcast, and much more.
Listen to the first episode of The Village is a Practice with Nina and Emma Van Den Boogert, above!
Below are some “mini-legends,” as well as recaps of a few areas of research that have emerged:
Celebration As Healing
March 8th was Jonas’s birthday, and I was looking forward to celebrating him. That morning, I prepared a breakfast of fried eggs, toast, salmon, avocado, cucumber, and lemon ginger tea. As we sat in the dining room, however, I noticed that, in a subtle energetic way, he was not accepting the love I was flowing to him.
When I asked what was going on, he began to tune into his feelings: “I feel sad because, for the past few years, I’ve created birthdays for myself that were miserable. I’m just beginning to discover now what it’s about. I remember my parents fighting on my birthday, even though it was supposed to be my day. I remember deciding that I didn’t get to celebrate.”
I stayed present with him as he felt his sadness. When he had stopped crying, I asked, “Will you practice allowing people to delight in you today?”
For the rest of the day, he took on the experiment—from a surprise birthday Zoom call with friends to a buckwheat cake decorated with wildflowers (assisted by Nina, Theo, and Ursula), an appreciation circle, and a 5Rhythms-inspired “wave,” Jonas allowed himself to let the love in.
This is just one example of the kind of healing that can happen in community.
Creating An Empowered Field
As the Infinity Ring (stewards of the long-term vision of Regenera), Nina, Jonas, Karl, and I scheduled three “intensive days” at the beginning of each month. We designed a program covering the basic distinctions of several transformational modalities, including Possibility Management and IFS, which we planned to deliver from Monday morning to Wednesday evening.
On Sunday, Karl brought a pivotal impulse: “Let’s scratch the plan and hold the three days in the style of surrendered leadership.”
In many spaces, I have observed that even the presence of a “spaceholder” creates implicit hierarchy. People (including me) expect that person to provide whatever it is they want (answers, aliveness, clarity) and fail to step up as empowered co-creators.
This was an experiment in trying something different, and what it created was radical.
Instead of the Infinity Ring deciding the direction of the space, the entire group was forced to reckon with what they wanted in the intensive days and what was needed to set the stage for these three months together.
Aon took a stand to come to a collective agreement on the context and purpose of Phase I, stating: “I’ve seen movements fail because they lack a clear context.” The group determined that, in order to move forward, a shared foundation of certain distinctions was needed: the Four Feelings (Anger, Sadness, Fear, and Joy) and their conscious applications, basic Parts Work, and Torus Technology (a non-hierarchical tool for collective decision-making). While these were similar conclusions to what the Infinity Ring had come to, they were made all the richer because they arose authentically from the group intelligence, rather than being imposed as top-down directives.
While I don’t recommend this experiment for every group, the background, experience, and capacity of the core team of Phase I made it possible to create a space of decentralized, co-creative leadership.
The Principle of Generosity
During the intensive days, the group worked with the Map of Low Drama, a modified version of Stephen Karpman’s Drama Triangle. The Map of Low Drama describes a common unconscious relational pattern in which people take on the roles of Victim, Persecutor, or Rescuer as a way of avoiding responsibility for their feelings and choices.
One potential hazard highlighted by the group was the tendency to become fanatical about the map—making it “wrong” or “bad” to be in Victim, Persecutor, or Rescuer, for example, or demonizing somebody because they made an offer that came from a place of care, but was “contaminated by” (i.e., carried the trace of) a Rescuer impulse.
In such instances, the group explored Generosity as a possible move: saying something like, “I see the care in what you’re doing (e.g., offering me your chair so I can sit down), and I don’t want to be rescued.”
Practiced in this way, the map becomes less a weapon for judging others and more a tool for taking responsibility and relating with clarity.
Creating vs. Relating
Early on in the intensive days, Aon brought the distinction of Relating vs. Creating: When are we in a Relating Space, and when are we in a Creating Space?
This is a distinction the Infinity Ring has been working with the past months, as well as one that Jonas and I track in our connection (we have separate chats for our Relating Space and our Creating Space).
Designating these spaces is a way to bring clarity about purpose and stay conscious of where the group is directing its energy and why.
The conversation began when Aon wanted to dive into the distinctions needed in Phase I, and a relational issue with his partner Vienera arose: “Often, in our relating, I want you to listen to me, and not just brush aside what I say,” she said.
When the group began to shift towards addressing the relational issue, Aon pushed back: “I don’t want the conversation to be derailed by every relational issue that comes up. It’s like the house is burning and I ask somebody to hand me the fire extinguisher and they say, ‘I don’t like the tone you used with me just now.’”
What Aon was pointing to was the importance of context—protecting Creating Space from being unconsciously overtaken by every interpersonal dynamic.
These relational issues inevitably affect the collective and our ability to create together. Relating is not an inconvenience to be handled so that creating can take place, but a microcosm of what is happening in the system as a whole.
What became clear in that moment was the necessity to differentiate spaces so that Creating does not devolve into endless processing and Relating is not bypassed in the name of efficiency.
In practice, this meant learning to move consciously between the two. As an experiment, our group has started to bring more clarity when proposing spaces by:
Naming whether it is a Relating or Creating Space
Sharing the purpose of the space (e.g., to foster greater intimacy in the group by sharing withholds)
Giving a rough sense of how long the space will take.
This creates clear containers for both, rather than collapsing them into one.
This experiment has deepened my own exploration of surrendered leadership and deconstructing hierarchy. Instead of assuming that others want what I want or beginning to unconsciously hold space, I make clear proposals and invitations—ones that others are free to accept or decline.
For example, at the start of grouptime, I might say: “I propose a Relating Space of Heart Gym (a paired practice where people feel and express from the Four Feelings) for 10 min each, for a total of 20 min. Any resistance?”
In this way, clarity of purpose allows both Creating and Relating to unfold with greater integrity.
Collaboration of the Masculine & Feminine
Some transformational modalities lean more towards the masculine (Yang), and some more towards the feminine (Yin).
Possibility Management is a Yang modality, with an emphasis on distinctions, action, efficiency, and creation. The energy of most PM spaces is what I would describe as penetrating and driving—operating with clear frameworks, precise language, and a sense of direction.
Circling is a Yin modality, with an emphasis on presence, attunement, slowness, and relating. The energy of most Circling spaces is what I would describe as spacious and open.
These two energies need one another.
Without attunement, Possibility Management spaces become cutting, aggressive, and disconnected.
Without direction, Circling spaces become stagnant, looping, and ambiguous.
One of the research areas that has emerged in Phase I is how to synthesize the masculine and feminine to create an integrated whole.
How can I hold spaces that are rooted both in deep presence and in clear purpose, and that bring people to their edge without pressure?
This is part of my current ongoing research.
The Planetary Peace Council
I was sitting in the main hall one evening when Aon and Marcus approached me to talk about collaboration with LØS (Landsforeningen af Økosamfund, the Danish Ecovillage Network). A moment later, Jonas arrived and pulled up a chair.
The air was charged with electricity, and while the conversation began with LØS, what ensued was something much bigger—an outline of a global movement, initiation journeys for youth, talks of a cryptocurrency, the “No Enemies” War Room, and a nondualistic, forceful vision for humanity—all of which will shape the future of Regenera as it continues to evolve.
Discover Regenera
For our Danish friends!
Discover Regenera is a 3-day workshop focused on collaboration and group dynamics in community.
This space focuses on practical tools for communication, shared decision-making, and responsibility in community life. We will work with simple distinctions around feelings and how they can be used constructively in everyday situations, and explore ways for individuals to take more agency and responsibility in group processes. The format is immersive and participatory—a shared experiment where we practice new ways of relating and collaborating and learn directly from what unfolds in the group.
The intention is to support ecovillages by strengthening the relational side of community life, alongside ecological and permaculture design.
Dates: 2-4 April, 10:00-18:00 daily
Contribution: 1800-3600 kr, sliding scale (includes meals and accommodation)
Location: Avalonhuset, Åsum
Registration here.
For more information, please reach out to regenera.life.project@gmail.com. 8 spots available.
Join Us
Join the Regenera Village Telegram group here. When you join, please introduce yourself and what brings you to Regenera.
Support Us
If you’d like to support our work, you can become a paid subscriber on Substack or contribute to our Artizen fund:
Please comment below to share about your discoveries in transformational community building!
Love,
Hannah
Loved this part "Relating is not an inconvenience to be handled so that creating can take place, but a microcosm of what is happening in the system as a whole."